I have, over many years, had several occasions when I have had to witness and/or deal with people in crisis. As an NCO in the Army, I had the responsibility to deal with young privates in financial trouble, soldiers ruining their lives with substance abuse, building occupants threatening violence over parking spaces and even extreme cases of murder, rape and one troop who threatened to kill himself and his entire family because he was being evicted from his house. It is deeply unnerving to have to deal with such things, knowing that you are completely unqualified and emotionally unprepared. In my church, I have been called upon to answer questions of eternal significance, and deal with families in crisis. There is nothing like seeing one of the "star" families in the ward putting on Sunday faces at church while falling apart during the week. In my own life, I have had to deal with personal problems that seemed overwhelming, and raising five children to adulthood has given me times when I have had to see the people I love most dealing with serious issues. Having myself survived an awful lot of tough times, I can maintain a sense of optimism because I know that bad times, like good times, come to an end. I always did my duty, whether it was in the way of assistance or discipline. But I was always careful to keep the confidentiality of everyone involved.
But what if those terrible times become public knowledge? My nephew had his 16 month old son murdered by his ex-wife's boyfriend a few years ago. It was, of course, front page news in our town and he couldn't walk the streets without people staring and pointing. He was innocent of any crime himself. But he was an object of curiosity. judgment and that vague sense of self-righteousness that we get when we see some heinous crime happening to someone else. We are, as a society, constantly looking for titillating scandals to feed the notion (usually false) that such things couldn't happen to us, because we are living right. I remember writing an op-ed piece for a weekly in Massachusetts defending a Taxi company owner who had just been convicted of torching a rival's taxicab. He was probably guilty. But, because the rival was black, the specter of burning crosses instead of cabs was brought to mind and he was getting crucified in the press, the bars and the barbershops. I knew the guy and felt sorry for him. The day after the piece was published, I was walking downtown across the street from the cab company and the dispatcher, Karen, came running across the street dragging an older woman with her and calling to me. Karen introduced me to the woman, the mother of the man I had defended. She hugged me, thanked me for the piece and told me her son had read it in jail and it was very comforting to him. That was simultaneously humbling and an ego boost for the Pooch. I was amazed that my writing had actually affected a family in this way.
Imagine now, if you can, the horror that is going on in Britney Spear's world right now. Did that make you roll your eyes? Are you thinking "Oh no, not another BS story about BS." Are you just sick of hearing about this spoiled kid who used to act so virginal and now can't even keep off the crap to keep her kids? Well guess what? Britney Spears is a human being. What is going on in her world right now is being replayed in thousands of homes across the country. Drug addicted mothers fighting inadequate dads over custody of kids they never should have had while trying to turn their own lives around - that's a story being rewritten over and over in a neighborhood near you. For the most part, apart from that "small circle of friends" Lanya alluded to in the Richpo poll thread, none of us know or care. But in Britney's case, we not only know, we REVEL in it. Because she is a celebrity, just a character on our TV screens, we get to indulge our inner voyeur, our sanctimonious natures and our thirst for blood. We no longer tolerate stoning, our civil religion forbids it. But we still do the deed vicariously, through the paparazzi.
Look at the pictures on the news. Screaming, swarming, camera-toting mobs are jockeying for the best shot of the ambulance, the kids, the star herself - looking stunned, shocked or just mouthing "where are my children?" Great stuff! The INSIDER proudly proclaimed that their footage was being used by all the major networks and even the OTHER tabloid TV programs. What a coup. Lord, if only we could get her to slit her wrists on camera! Wouldn't that be great?
And we all watch. No, I don't make a habit of watching the Insider, though I can't escape TMZ at night since it is the only thing on and I keep the TV running to help sooth my insomnia. But millions make a point of it, and even I get caught up in it sometimes. I admit I watched the Insider this evening just to see what all the fuss was about, since every newscast was featured a toned-down take on the story (sort of a public pebbling). I wish I hadn't now. The image of Britney looking dazed and devastated is haunting. "You make them stars, " the TMZ tag line goes. "We make them real." But this is not reality anymore than the characters these people play on TV or the personas they put on for the stage. It is a parody of reality, a travesty of truth. There's nothing real about this tragedy except the tragedy itself. Paparazzi swarming like frenzied Pharisees, exposing their warped vision of truth like stripping a victim bare. A string of shouted questions like accusations from some grotesque Sanhedrin. Camera bulbs flashing like hundreds of stones being cast simultaneously. And all of us looking on, cheering the accusers and jeering the victim, dutifully playing our parts in this bloodless but no less deadly lynching. And why not? After all, the victim is not exactly innocent, is she?
Can any of us see not the celebrity but the human life being destroyed? Do any of us who self-righteously profess concern about her poor children, see the child in the troubled adult whose life is beyond her own control? Does anybody notice a man, stooping down, writing with his finger on the ground? Or is the figure lost in the lights, the shouting, the stones?
There is a child of God who is, tonight, in deep crisis. She is not innocent, but neither are any of us. Nor is she the only person in the world in despair. There are many in worse trouble, and many of those far more innocent than she is. But for the horrible crime of celebrity, Britney Spears is sentenced to the symbolic casting of stones. Her despair is our nightly entertainment, her stoning our judgment. The scribes and Pharisees of our day have cameras, tabloids and websites, but they are no less barbaric or harsh in their judgments than those of 2000 years ago. How many people will say a prayer for Britney Spears tonight? How many think that she got herself into this mess, so she deserves what she gets? That is what the Pharisees thought. But then, they couldn't see the writing on the ground. Over two thousand years, the writing has long since faded. All that is left is the question "Woman, where art those thine accusers?" The answer is, just look for the flashing lights.