Joke I got in the mail today

[Amianthus]

Politically Correct Football

The Politically Correct National Football League would like to announce its name changes and schedules for the coming season:

The Washington Native Americans will host the New York Very Tall People on opening day.

Other key games include the Dallas Western-Style Laborers hosting the St. Louis Uninvited Guests, and the Minnesota Plundering Norsemen taking on the Green Bay Meat Industry Workers.

In Week 2, there are several key matchups, highlighted by the showdown between the San Francisco Precious Metal Enthusiasts and the New Orleans Pretty Good People. The Atlanta Birds of Prey will play host to the Philadelphia Birds of Prey, while the Seattle Birds of Prey will visit the Phoenix Male Finches.

The Monday night game will pit the Miami Pelagic Percoid Food Fishes against the Denver Untamed Beasts of Burden. The Cincinnati Large Bangladeshi Carnivorous Mammals will travel to Tampa Bay for a clash with the West Indies Freebooters later in Week 9. And the Detroit Large Carnivorous Cats will play the Chicago Securities-Traders-in-a-Declining-Market. Week 9 also features the Indianapolis Young Male Horses at the New England Zealous Lovers of Country.

[Xavier_Onassis]

Very funny!

but...

Miami Pelagic Percoid Food Fishes against the Denver Untamed Beasts of Burden.

I believe that the Miami team are not percoid food fishes, but pelagic cetacean mammals. It is rare to name a sports team for creatures that humans consider edible. Unusually slow creatures, such as sloths, snails, turtles, tortoises and slugs are also unlikely to become mascots.

Despite the indispensable contribution to sports, the organism most responsible for the success of  professional sports teams is never considered. I purpose that we have a team known as the Milwaulkee Yeast.  Yeast has been ignored for far too long as a beneficial creature to human civilization.

Without yeast, there is no beer. Without beer, half the sponsors are no more.

[Amianthus]

Miami Pelagic Percoid Food Fishes against the Denver Untamed Beasts of Burden.

I believe that the Miami team are not percoid food fishes, but pelagic cetacean mammals. It is rare to name a sports team for creatures that humans consider edible. Unusually slow creatures, such as sloths, snails, turtles, tortoises and slugs are also unlikely to become mascots.

There is a variety of food fish that is also called "dolphin" - to prevent confusion, however, most (all?) US restaurants now use the Hawaiian name for the fish - mahi-mahi (people were protesting the use of the mammal as a food source in some places, even though it not being used). I do understand, however, that the icon for the Miami team is the mammal variety.

[Xavier_Onassis]

The Miami mascot appears to be a bottlenosed dolphin.

The name "mahi-mahi" sounds more exotic than the former name "dolphin". It is a rather delicious fish, but comparatively speaking, a rather ugly one, as its head is flat rather than aerodynamic.

I don't think that there are any pro sports teams named for animals that Americans regularly eat.

The Japanese are rather fond of all cetaceans: whales, dolphins, orcas, narwhals and such. I have heard that eating oceanic mammals was because of encouragement from the US occupational government, since Americans felt that the Japanese needed more red meat, and Japan is too mountainous to raise cattle or sheep in sufficient numbers.