Is it that they are laid back or don't want to discuss their beliefs?
May be a combination of the two. Or that they really have no idea what they believe.
If you want to see a crowd at just about any church, your best bet is to go at Christmas or Easter. The rest of the time, you'll see a lot of empty seats and a few hardcore members who are there every Sunday (or Saturday). Most of those, I'd bet, rarely read and really study the Bible on their own; the simply go and let the minister spoon feed them his/the church's version of the text and their interpretation of it. I've talked to people who really have no idea what their church believes about some issues, because although they are members and believe they are devout (whatever), they have never taken the time and effort to see what their religion really believes. They probably know the basics, the stuff they hear every Sunday (or however often they manage to go), but that's about it. That's the stuff Baptists, Methodists, Lutherans, Pentecostals, et cetera, all agree on; ask them what the differences are, and odds are they can't name any, or at most one or two. Then you have the different sects within the sects - why did this group break away from that one? What did they differ on? Was it a major theological difference, or a minor point?
Some Baptists believe all alcohol consumption is a sin, and will only use grape juice for communion.
Some believe wine is okay for communion, but that all other alcohol consumption is a sin.
Some believe moderate consumption is okay.
I mentioned I asked questions of ministers; I asked one hardcore Baptist once if alcohol was a sin, why would Jesus turn the water to wine at the wedding party? The answer I got was that wine, in Biblical times, was no more than mere grape juice. My next question was how Aaron's sons got drunk on 'mere grape juice' and defiled the temple, causing God to strike them dead? Silence.
Ministers are good at making up crap to support their point of view. That's why I'm not overly impressed by folks who only know what they have been spoonfed in church. I have a lot more respect for someone who has actually taken the time and effort to study the Bible and find out things on their own.
I had a Jehovah's Witnesses couple show up at my door one day, and I was in a sporting mood, so I let them in. After two hours of my asking them about the finer points of their religion, and explaining them to them when they couldn't answer, they left with a couple of pages of notes on things to ask their elders. I've never had Jehovah's Witnesses knock on my door again - I imagine the elders gave all their missionaries a warning not to come to my house anymore because I would corrupt them.
See, I spent several years going to different churches, trying to find one where I fit in. I listened to the sermons, checked out the finer points of their doctrine, and really learned quite a bit about the differences between the denominations. When I finally found one where I felt I fit in, I eventually became a deacon, and actually was making plans to go to the theological school at Vanderbilt University, with plans to become a minister.
That, though, was many years ago. A lot of water has passed under the bridge since then.
I'm pretty low-key about my beliefs, or lack of them. I don't feel it is incumbent upon me to impose them on others, and I appreciate the same in return. I'm not going to rant about how wrong you are to believe in a god you can't prove exists, because I figure if it makes you feel better about yourself and life in general, then have at it. If it eases the burden of this life on you to believe there is some higher power, some divine reason why things happen the way they do, then more power to you. See, I don't have the same problem theists do; I'm not worried that I have to convert you to believe the same way I do, because if I don't, you're going to burn in hell for eternity. To me, it doesn't matter what you believe, because we're all destined for the same fate when we die anyway: worm food.
