why is marraige a goodthing?

[Amianthus]

If the article implied that the single households were counted apart from the other non-trads, my math skills drew the correct conclusion and yours did not.

But it did not imply that fact; it was an incorrect assumption on your part.

[Plane]

"The growing length of time partners spend with only each other for company, in some instances, has made individuals less willing to put up with an unhappy marriage, while women's economic independence makes it less essential for them to do so," Coontz wrote.

Back when Women depended on Men, Divorce was less common.

Now Women are less dependant, divorce is more common.

Was it always Men that liked the arrangement?

[Lanya]

Replying to Plane:

Yes.

[Plane]

Replying to Plane:

Yes.

Hmmmmmmm....

[Xavier_Onassis]

It really doesn't matter whether there are more or fewer married households. Marriage is a personal thing. It is good for some people, adequate for some,  barely tolerable for others and a pain in the ass for others. The statistics are meaningless here, just like statistics that seek to prove that tomato soup is good for you because a majority of people like it.

People need to evaluate the entire question of whether to get married, including ythe pros and cons, and do whatever floats their individual boats.

The popularity of marriage proves only how popular it is. This is irrelevent to any specific individual.

[kimba1]

Marriage is a personal thing>

Not really,when I got married thee most common thing I`ve been asked is when are we getting kids.
there are sooo many implied obligation in a marraige.

It`s hardly something between a husband and wife.
people can say they only married each other.
but most times a marraige involves friends,family,friends of family & sometimes pets.
the support is nice
but lets be truth families don`t always provide it without strings attached .
p.s. when parents pay for  the wedding,it NEVER free to the couple NEVER free

[Xavier_Onassis]

By marriage is a personal thing, I mean that the DECISION to get married is a personal thing. Whether the marriage is a success or a disaster also depends on the couple nearly all of the time, though having a child with physical and/or mental problems could certainly;y affect the outcome.

It would be a personal decision for a man to have a vasectomy or a woman to have her tubes tied prior to the wedding, too.

My point is that statistics have zilch to do with the degree by which any two married people succeed or fail at having a happy marriage.

[kimba1]

and sometimes only one of them made the decision.
a friend of mines boyfriends proposed with thee most romantic proposal
your not getting any younger.
i very much doubt this is a rare line used.
funny ,but sad

[Xavier_Onassis]

a friend of mines boyfriends proposed with thee most romantic proposal
your not getting any younger.
i very much doubt this is a rare line used.

===========================================
It is about as obvious a line as could exist.

The thought behind it would have to be, "You are going to get married anyway, and your time is running out. Better settle for me, because it's probably the best you can do. IN a few years, you will be old and wrinkly and no man will be interested in you."

True, but unromantic, and the sassumption is that a bad marriage is better than a life unmarried is dubious at best.

I was married twice, for 25 years (of which five were happy) and 6 years (of which 6 months at best were tolerable).

[kimba1]

your right!!

the line   a bad marriage is better than a life unmarried

is said alot in my youth.

I think the thinking is marraige is a duty to maintain the family ,but the happiness of the couple is of low priority

I know someone who doesn`t love her husband at all,but doesn`t care as long as the family is together.
and she don`t care about her relative that much at all.
it`s all about  duty to her.

and strangely I think it`ll last longer than most other marriage.

[Plane]

Some people can't be happy , no life situation is going to "make " them happy.


Should people like this marry each other even though it will not be about happyness?

[Lanya]

your right!!

the line   a bad marriage is better than a life unmarried

is said alot in my youth.

I think the thinking is marraige is a duty to maintain the family ,but the happiness of the couple is of low priority

I know someone who doesn`t love her husband at all,but doesn`t care as long as the family is together.
and she don`t care about her relative that much at all.
it`s all about  duty to her.

and strangely I think it`ll last longer than most other marriage.

__________________
Sure, there's duty.  Especially in some ethnic or religious groups. It's a must, to marry and have kids.   

[_JS]

but lets be truth families don`t always provide it without strings attached

You're damn right about that kimba!

Sure, there's duty.  Especially in some ethnic or religious groups. It's a must, to marry and have kids.

That's true Lanya, different cultures view marriage very differently. As far as religion goes, it might have to do with the very purpose of intercourse itself. For some Christians intercourse is supposed to only take place for the sole purpose of procreation.

For some interesting comparisons look at the culture of Mali and then the nearby bedouins (sp?) of the Sahara. They have some interesting practices along these lines.