If Supreme Court Justices Were Rock Stars
JB
(What, you mean they aren't?)
This parlor game emerged from dinner table discussions at the Schmooze. Match Supreme Court Justices with the Rock/Pop/Country artist who has the same basic "style" in their opinion writing, and give your reasons. But always remember, we're focusing on the style, not the politics.
Some of my favorites:
Sandra Day O'Connor-- Britney Spears. (The early Britney, pre-K-Fed, not the later, trashy Britney.) Artistically incoherent but enormously successful attempts to appeal to the exact center of popular taste.
William Rehnquist-- David Byrne of Talking Heads, Blondie, Devo. Unsentimental, terse, and cleverly ironic 80's New Wave post-punk. (Psycho-Killer could easily be a Rehnquist opinion except, of course, for the use of French. No foreign sources in our Constitution, thank you.).
Anthony Kennedy-- Lionel Richie, Barry Manilow. Overly earnest ballads that set your teeth on edge.
Clarence Thomas-- Prince, Lou Reed. Key aesthetic ideal: I don't give a **** what *you* think. The Justice Formerly Known as Clarence.
Ruth Bader Ginsberg-- Alanis Morissette. A Jagged Little Constitution.
Antonin Scalia-- Meat Loaf. Histrionic Opera Rock.
David Souter-- Paul Simon. Bookish, a little too insular and self-contained. Still crazy after all these years.
John Paul Stevens-- Willie Nelson. Crusty, independent, been around forever. (But what about his vote in the marijuana case?)
Stephen Breyer-- Nobody. Stephen Breyer doesn't rock and roll.
We didn't know enough about Sam Alito and John Roberts to match them to anyone yet. But in the fullness of time we will know if they are the Clash or just Richard Marx.
Feel free to offer your own nominations-- and your reasons-- in the comments.
Posted 4:42 PM by JB [link]
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Comments:
Wow. Whatever they're servin' at the schmooze, I want some. "Jagged Little Constitution"? "Prince, Lou Reed"? You have blown my surrealism circuits with this one. (Do you really think Stevens is most likely to get busted with psilocybin?)
B^)
# posted by Robert Link : 7:14 PM
The possibilities are endless:
Sam Alito -- Clay Aiken. We weren't convinced he was talented, but he was the best candidate on TV at the time.
John Roberts -- Dave Grohl. Sang backup for a hugely influential Reinquist before doing his own thing.
# posted by Ralphy : 10:57 PM
Scalia is Iron Maiden's Bruce Dickinson. Histrionic, operatic, but knocks you on your ass when he opens his mouth.
# posted by Robert Muñoz : 1:15 AM
http://balkin.blogspot.com/2006/12/if-supreme-court-justices-were-rock.html
